Those who had to negotiate and establish business relationships with the Chinese not by correspondence, but personally, know that if you are invited to the restaurant you absolutely can not refuse. Your refusal can offend the Chinese partner and can disrupt the whole thing. Fed or not, free or occupied, you should accept the invitation to the restaurant.
In an extreme case, if the invitation came suddenly and you can not change your plans – it is necessary to apologize and lunch or dinner at the restaurant at the earliest possible time. But it is better to know this feature of Chinese business culture: after the negotiations in the office, your evening will continue at the restaurant. And respectively plan your time.
You also need to take the initiative and invite the Chinese to the restaurant. Because “consumeristic” attitude of business partners to each other is unacceptable for them. And this is how they perceive the attempts to restrict the business negotiations, showing no interest to each other as a person. One of the great ways to show such an interest – have dinner or lunch with them.
But here’s the rub! Many of us know that you need to sit at the table with Chinese partners, but we have no idea how to do it correctly. And, of course, we can only spoil the relationship, instead of strengthening them. Today’s article focuses on how to behave at the table in a real chinese restaurant.
Lunch at a Chinese restaurant – it’s for long.
Food for Chinese is the ceremony, ritual and occasion to talk. Your haste in eating will be perceived as a desire to get rid of the process and the interlocutor quickly, that is insulting to the Chinese and therefore it is necessary to have a leisurely, measured eating at the same time leading the conversation. In China, the food and the conversation takes place simultaneously. And it is not quick.
Note: after the meal is over, all will stand together and bow. The Chinese conversation lasts until the meal lasts. Therefore, if you do not want to be trapped and seem disrespectful – do not be in a hurry. Make pauses during a meal and talk.
Features of Chinese behavior at the table
If you are invited by the Chinese side, and they chose the restaurant – they will criticize the quality of food. The same Chinese would do inviting you to their place, saying that the duck has been failed and the tea is tasteless. Your task is not to agree with this in any case, even if you really did not like it. On the contrary, strongly praise the food and service. Accordingly, if you have invited Chinese partners somewhere on your territory – “cry the blues” and lament, and they will praise everything. That is the rule of courtesy.
A few words on courtesy and etiquette
Keep in mind: there are lots of dishes in Chinese restaurant. And you are expected that you try each. This fact again points to the need to take the time with a meal. The waiter served something – try a little, and then wait for the next dish and talk. By the way, when the chinese offer you to try each dish – first refuse politely, or you will be suspected of avarice. You will be offered again – and then you agree. It’s just a ritual, first refuse and then agree – certainly, if you want to look like a polite man.
Leave some food on your plate at the end of the meal. Otherwise, you will make it clear that the owners have poorly fed you. If you eat in a traditional Chinese restaurant – the last change of dishes is rice or noodles, and here it is necessary to leave a bit on the plate. If the restaurant is western, still leave anything.
About drinks in the chinese restaurant
During the meal it is considered impolite, if the guest has’t got a cup of tea. All the time you will be addeed some tea. This does not mean that you necessarily should drink it immediately – otherwise your conversation would be like working of the water wheel. Just drink as much as you need.
You can refuse drinking alcohol – this is not considered to be something offensive. You can drink. The Chinese may try to drink you at the table to see what you will say and do in a very drunken state. So be careful. And remember you can give up. Alcohol is not food.
Bad signs in a Chinese restaurant
If you eat at a Chinese restaurant, keep in mind: do not stick chopsticks into food – it is a very bad omen. Many people, unaccustomed to the stick and do this, and it scares the Chinese, because it looks like a funeral candles, which they stick in a bowl of sand during the funeral. And if you drop them on the floor it is also a bad sign. Yet it is necessary not to specify with the sticks to other people. Do not cross your sticks with sticks of other people when you both take food from a common dish.
When we eat fish we often overturn it after having eaten one side to get to the other. Do not do it sitting next to the Chinese – inverted fish symbolizes the upturned boat, which is sad. Simply remove the spine and bones and leave the fish lying like it was.
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