How to survive the guy on the first acquaintance with her parents?

You may don`t know how to make a good impression on the parents of your girlfriend, especially on the first or second meeting with them. It is important to show the respect, interest and let them know how much you love their daughter.

Part 1 of 3: How to make a good impression

1. Perform a kind of the preparation. Before the meeting with the parents of your girlfriend, you should find out some information about them. If you have already met before, you need to know about them a little bit more for the next meeting. Ask your girlfriend about a few highlights, such as where they are working, where they are from, what are their hobbies or something else that can help you establish a contact with them. If you hear that you like the same sport`s team or the mom of your girlfriend is  working in the same field as you are (or something like that), it will help you to start a conversation and make a contact. If you know that you and her parents have something in common, do not raise this theme at the same moment, as soon as you came inside the house. Wait until the conversation appears pause and say, “Do you know, Ivan Viktorovich, I heard that you also really like Real Madrid,” or something like that. Be honest with your girlfriend, instead of trying to hide something. Tell her that you want to know a few things about her parents, to find a common language with them. If you don`t see them yet, you can ask her about who they are. If you know in advance that her father loves sarcastic jokes or her mother is very talkative, you will be more prepared to the meeting.

2. Shake your hands like a real man. When you will greet them, your handshake should be polite and firm, and remember about careful eye contact, smile and let them know that to be there is an honor for you.

3. You need to dress well. For the first meeting, wear something presentable. You must have the beautiful clothes that fit the occasion. Take a shower, shave and brush your hair well.

4. Bring a gift that corresponds the occasion. If you go to visit them for the first time, you should go with a flowers or other gifts to express your respect. You can also bring a bottle of a good wine. Talk to your girlfriend about the tastes of her parents. Even if you’ve been the guest in theiur house before, to come empty-handed is indecent. Even a simple gift from you will show your prudence.

5. Make sure that your body language is positive. You should make sure that it express an openness and interest. Stand or sit straight, observe the eye contact, do not slouch, use your hands for the gesticulation or keep them on the sides, but do not cross in a front of you. You also should not fidget, otherwise you will create the impression that you’re bored or you’re worried about something. Observe the open position of the body, directing it to the parents, do not turn to the one side. This shows that you want to communicate with them.

6. Ask parents do they need some help from you. If you have a meeting in their home, you need to offer any help. Maybe you can help her father to put the grill, and mother – to remove after a delicious dinner. Maybe you will find the another way to help them around the house to show that you care about and want to be helpful. Most likely, her parents will tell you that they do not need any help, but you’ll look like a gentleman.

Part 2 of 3: How to behave with your girlfriend

1. Treat their daughter with respect. This is the only one most important thing you can do to conquer them. Be a gentleman and treat her like a lady. Despite the fact that when you`re with her you can tease each other, in a front of her parents try first to bring this behavior to a minimum, as long as they do not really understand that this is the way how you make fun of each other. Otherwise, they may think that you do not respect her.

2. Demonstrate the minimum of your feelings. In addition to kisses and hugs in a front of the parents’ faces, there are other ways to show them how much you love their daughter. If you really want to show that you love her, you can hold her hand and slightly show your sympathy, but in any case, do not overdo it.

3. Make everything positive, so they will understand how much you love their daughter. You can be a billionaire or a movie star, and you’ll be indifferent to them, if you`re cold in the relation with their daughter or you`re looking down on her. Despite the fact that you do not need to praise her to the skies or say something that is not in fact, they want see that their daughter is special for you. You have to make them believe in the seriousness of your intentions. The actual fact that you are trying hard to appeal them, shows how much she means to you.

Although it considered old-fashioned to say that her parents want you to be able to provide her well, fair to say that they want to see a guy who, at least, can take care of himself. If studying or job isn`t a really good theme for you, talk about what you like in fact, for example, about playing on the guitar, or collecting the stamps. Show that you are interested in something.

Part 3 of 3: How to start a conversation

1. You must participate in a conversation and be interested in it. It is important to act like if you are interested in a conversation with the parents of your girlfriend, even if you are talking about the payment of taxes or the cultivation of cauliflower. Ask a lot of questions, politely nod your head, and give parents all your attention. Be sure to react when they will try to make jokes. Such behavior has a great importance, and it will show them that you are a good and nice young man.

When they ask you the questions, do not answer in two words, simple “yes” or “no.” Even if her parents ask a question that implies the answer “yes” or “no,” you can respond more advanced.

2. Give them your full attention. The most important thing is to put aside your phone, and it’s not a joke. If necessary, turn off the phone. The last thing you want to achieve is to annoy her parents when your behavior is too steep, looking at your phone every five seconds. Try to sound as much as possible older. Be polite, use good manners, do not use obscene words, be courteous and pleasant companion. You can express your maturity by talking about the plans for the future. Don`t retrieve your lost a lot, do not complain and don`t make the comments that can show you ignorant.

Remember that her mom is a woman, regardless of your age, she wants for her daughter to meet a man, not a boy. The girlfriend`s parents want this man to do well on her influence and stimulate her growth.

3. Demonstrate good manners. You do not need to overdo it and behave as a British aristocrat. However, you must be ready to say “please” and “thank you”, when you need to ask for a dish, instead of to pass and lean across the table and take it by yourself. It is necessary to push a chair for your girlfriend (if it is before you have not did already), and do not interrupt others while talking.

You should also know how to politely refer to her parents. It is not difficult. Call them the way they presented themselves during your dating. If the father says, “Call me Sasha,” so do not be afraid to call him so. But if it seems “Alexander P.” then refer to it that is the best until he will tell you to talk differently.

4. Avoid the controversial topics. If you know that you have other views or you just want to be polite, then you should avoid the controversial topics. Otherwise, you will not surprise anyone, and only create awkward and unpleasant conversation.

If you feel that the conversation becomes awkward, because her parents do not agree with you, try to gently change the subject of the conversation.

5. Make a sincere compliment. Another way to impress the parents of your girlfriend and make a good impression is to do all sorts of the compliments. They should not sound willfully, and you should not tell them too much, but a compliment at the right moment will really help them to see that you value their company and take care about their daughter.

Here are some things for which you can praise them:

The painting, souvenir or a piece of furniture in their house;

Food that you eat (if they have prepared the food);

Earrings of her mother and others.

6. Be honest. Parents like honesty regardless of the situation: so they feel more comfortable trusting you their daughter, so it is mean that you must always answer for their questions honestly. In addition, parents have more experience than you, they can understand when you cheat, no matter how plausible you get. You should not lie when it comes to such important issues as education or your plans for the future.

7. Demonstrate the confidence. Tell yourself that you are a good man who cares about the daughter of these people. Feel safe and confident, but do not turn up their nose high. Not only pretending sure: you have to feel it, otherwise you will not get the desired effect.

8. Speak directly and be sincere. At the first meeting with the parents be sure to observe the eye contact when you talk to them. Do not look to the side, grumbles and do not be silent. When you speak, be confident in your words and show that you believe in what you say and that you believe in yourself. Try to say as little as possible “er” and as little as possible to turn to your girlfriend for help when you have nothing to say. Wait one minute to formulate the idea – this is normal.

9. Do not behave excitedly. No matter how much you worry – keep your head high. Do not fuss, do not look around the room and do not make too big pause before answering. Just take a deep breath and tell parents what they should to hear from you. Worrying is normal, but you need to make your experience as unobtrusively as possible. If they will see that you are very worried, they will think that you do not have enough confidence in yourself and you’re not prepared. Constantly convince yourself that if you like your girlfriend, you need to like her parents.

Do not worry that you look excited, and don`t be nervous! You will be only worse.

At the end of the day you have to understand that if you looked a little excited there is nothing to worry about. The first meeting with her parents will take you through the awkwardness, but they will understand your position.

10. Do not forget to be yourself. Do not try to seem someone else just in order to be the best for her parents. You should not change, to surprise them. Do not forget that your girlfriend has chosen you for some reason. In addition, parents can see when the guys are playing for the public. There is a difference between them to see your side, reflecting the maturity and responsibility, and your desire to appear completely different person. If you plan to be with their daughter for a long time, you can not ever pretend.